Parent jokes
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Old-fashioned Zachary approached Lureen's father, intent upon asking him for her hand in marriage.
"Sir," he blurted out, "I have an attachment for your daughter, and "
"See here, young man," interrupted the parent, "when my daughter needs accessories, I'll buy them myself."
Mrs. Ellis came home from work one evening to find her three-year-old son lighting up a cigar. She raced into the kitchen where her husband was making dinner.
"Hey!" she announced. "This is terrible! I just caught Matthew lighting a cigar!"
"You put a stop to that right now," he shouted.
"That kid is altogether too young to be playing with matches!"
Did you hear about the little boy who was named after his father ?
They called him Dad !
Dad: Why is your January report card so bad ?
Son: Well, you know how it is. Things are always marked down after Christmas !
Teddy came thundering down the stairs, much to his father's annoyance.
'Teddy,' he called, 'how many more times have I got to tell you to come down the stairs quietly? Now, go back up and come down like a civilised human being.'
There was a silence, and Teddy reappeared in the front room.
'That's better,' said his father. 'Now will you always come down stairs like that?'
'Suits me,' said Teddy. 'I slid down the bannister.'
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